good band names
We got a gig, so what do we call ourselves? Read on...

Let's face it, thinking of a cool band name can be as hard as writing a hit tune. Harder even, since all the band members have their own favorite and it is almost impossible to get everyone to agree. You could always fall back on that old favorite Free Beer because nothing looks better on a marquee than Free Beer here tonite! But that's old and tired, and your band should be young and wired.

I can remember my first band... a folk group called The Spaz Lads. Hey, gimme a break, you gotta remember this was back when the Beatles were still together and Lennon hadn't even found out he was the Walrus yet. But later on we changed to a more rocking music style so a heavier name was necessary. You know the trend, look for a yin-yang, heavy-soft moniker. Like Featherstone, Iron Butterfly or Led Zeppelin... I think we were Tin Blimp for a week or two, then Paper Castles. I guess Glass Houses was already taken, I can't remember.

So where do you start? It's not any different than writing a song. Get a notebook and carry it around with you all the time. Jot down ideas, phrases, even just words with an appealing sound.

You are carrying a notebook with you all the time, aren't you? I bought one of the digital recorders for $20 that holds up to 90 seconds of recorded sound. It's not much bigger than a credit card and I keep it in my pocket at all times. When I get an idea or hear a catchy phrase, I just whip it out and whisper into the mike. Sure, you end up with 85 seconds of stupidity but the remaining 5 seconds might contain a gem. Besides, now I never forget what I want from the store on my way home!

The result is that I now have many more good band names than I will ever have a use for. Remember, a bad pun or stupid name that is clever or catchy can keep you from being lost in the shuffle along with The Thudpuckers.

Let's look at some of the names I've accumulated (Say them out loud if you can't figure out the meanings but only if there is no one else in the room. BTW, if you lose all good sense and decide to use one of the selections from the band names list, be sure to send me an e-mail message about it).

The Voigt-Kampff Test Lickspittle The Gynoids The Merkins
Neandertallica Big Debt Generation TEOTWAWKI Clown Barf
Lawyered Up Swiss Dance Posse The Ganksters The Graceful Dad
Palliards and Priggers The Kinchin Doxies Polymath Distopia
The Skullets Endowed with Apathy The Polemicists Primates in Charge
Skunk Apes Geriatric Lolitas Jazz Hands The Pulpit Pimps
The Eyebrow Coalition Fee Nothing More Pathetic Justice Genius Kong**
Ashes of Angst Paralyzing Paradoxes The Strumpettes Remember Theory**
Satanica The Tiddie Men The Fusterclucks The Stoic Maniacs
The Yeast Inflections Split Tongue Sheep of Satan Upper Class Pain
Daytime Dreamland Shameful End** The Metaphors Strange Hate
Solitary Sarcasms Smart Azz Bushmeat Short Attention Span Theater
Dipping Skinny Sly Jackanapes The Swinging Yeast Spiral Puppets
Night Soil Disciple Down The Wag Bags The Fondue Party
The Tramp Stampers The Fazy Luckers** Savoir Sinners The Stupidiots**
Pretentious Deficit Disorder The Tin Whiskers** Hits the Fan Technophagists
Laddie Dada Standalone** The Keggers Zombabies
Firedrake Blind Dominos Agrippa Mangina
Full of Fail** Godspoke Men Spatterdash The Pommies
The Wango Tangos The Gentlemen Losers** Burning Chrome The Quark Jets
Hormesis The Speculums The Proverbials The Leper Coons
Is U Is Phlogiston The Norks Torpedo Juicers
Formerly Lucky** The Savage Twits The Enigmatics Prophet Sea**
Raze the Dead** The Road Apples Shyster and Flywheel Slumboy Poets**
The Redonculants Truth Bypass The Other White Meat The Stuttgart Social Club
Cubic's Rubes Mojomatic Grasshopper Conspiracy** Crosseyed Mary
Wishcraft Yuck Fu** Long Pig Scrapheap Mojo
Stranger Danger** Embrace the Gristle The Buck Fuddies Wizards of Science
Beatbox Metal Shallow Throat Going Medieval Nutraloaf
The Curmudgeons Pitbulls in Lipstick The Yarbles Chuff Puppy
The Junkyard Gods** The Cremains Euphemisms of Rock Nooner
Brawndo The Groom Reapers The Nurdles Teuton Commons
Hamsturd The Casimir Effect** The Fist Jabbers The Moobs**
Hillbilly Home Boys Zombie In-Laws Vampire Poodles Kneel before Zod
Linux Grey** Nicely Nicely** Freak Daddy Coochistink
Client-9** What? What!** Unmarked Rapper Lonesome Zombies
Full Metal Jam Band Lunch Among the Cannibals** Dub Punks Two Timing Lolitas**
Fear the Mullet Oh No Yoko! The Men o' Pause The Stigmatics
Wear More Corduroy The Sporks The Spanking Punkins Fetid Spirits
Zitler Girly Scream Fistpickers Raccoon Antlers
667 Neighbor of the Beast** Rockers-R-Us** @$$ Marky de Sod
Hobbitch Band of Homonoids Not Zee's Anus of Uranus
Vagablonde Benevolent Anarchy** Moneydance** She Wolves of the SS
Abraham Lickin' McGizmo The Bucking Fastards** Majik 12
Sqirlz The Umlauts The Hustle Hoffs Stepping Razor
The Fuskers Jelq Dukes of Hubris Stunt Brains
The Fecks Shotgun Orchestra** Hip Hopera Shyte Storm
Suicide Opera** Probation Relations Toe Tag Tommy Hero in Error**
Gothabilly Rangers Peg Leg Pig Motel Meth** Electro-Spam
Fupid** The Pornosseurs Plinth Malt Licker
The She Mullets Apocalypso Zorrow** Ganzfeld
Brainwired** Buddha's Love Handles** Horrorshow** Photon Soup
Our Lady of Perpetual Tone Strange Brew** Fun with Physics** The Hominids
Shaven Hirsute Viagra Monologues Butt Weasels Drive-By Rappers
Roboplegic Uncouth Yute The Bizarro Bipolar Bunnies
Able Danger The Cronies Ice Nine** Demi-Dog
Flaymates Pie Hole D3ath Cr33ps Semper Gumby
Dicktallica Plain White Rapper Flagrante Delicto Kyoob
Cute Cocks Clan The Coprolites Toe Tagged Obsequious
God Eat God Wrongcock Phussy Trapper Keepers
Atonal Atoms Dirtnap** Cone of Silence Biznitch
Mourning Wood** The Tourettes Trout Pout Stockholm Syndrome**
Poplolly Pangea Devil Shat Ice Cubes in Hell
Cult of Clowns** Silly Millimeter Leap of Faith** Fuzz Savant
Nascent Daddy Pants Brood Brothers Blue Caca
Jimi Zeppelin Fanboy Legions Yanker Bongholio
Pity Party Space-Age Bachelor Pad God Hates You Cold Hell
Tung Uranus Necromonger Jailbait Aesthetics Sushi Fry Cooks
Plexistentialism Vomitorius The Bumjacks Gun N. Mouth
Monkey Pox** The Effin Band** The Zeolites Phallusy
Gildenstoltz 9mm Hate** Hi-Tech Rednecks Lucy Fur
The Prostitots Bolognation The Vittles** Megatech
Blue Boners The Chicksie Dicks Screaming Mimes** Finding Emo**
All Hat No Cattle Moonshiner Johnny Stash Beauty School Dropouts**
The Fuglies Comaphoric MILF Zafty
Songicide** The Grateful Dude Capgun Suicide** Copralites
Pear Shaped Girls The Cankers Patooey Sheepless in Seattle
Redneck Sushi** Bumcakes Zigns** Phooner**
Funk Sway** Porn Queens of the Bible Belt Beat Beauticians Swistica
Heidi Ho One Inch Tacks The Weed Whackers Pimpinhoe
Ritalin Boyz Posse Comitatus Doobie Us Paranoid Droids
Metal Monks Gentlemen Clowns Pharm Boys Wanksters**
Bhong** The Drogues** Karmic Bitch Slap The Blunts**
The Middle Fingers Eminent** Old Dog New Trick** Unibrow**
The Necropolitans Puff Dicky The Jodhpur Kings The Femme Reapers
Cadavre Exquis Slack Jaws Curfew Cuties** Smell My Fingers
Community Service Holy Roses** The Zen Koans** Edema
Short Bus Riders** Pompous Pilate Eurolanders Gros Seins
Duality of Man Frigid Nymphos Bum Hucksters Man Pie
Chicks with Hicks Sancho Panzer Jesus Wannabes Black Velvet Elvis**
Touching Tongues Valentunes Robo Pope Zeusifer**
Nerds with Aptitudes Hanoi Jane Doe Porno Blues Band Wabash Cannibals**
Mullet Heads Deaf Leper The Pink Mandingos The Generics
Puckey Vague Prophets The Mooks** The Dims
The Standup Philosophers Pricks with Chicks** The Doxologists Posse Lips
Wroughtweiler The Stretch Marks Ritalin-Free Barbie** Zatan
Homemade Sin** Psyclops Jeebus The Meme Boys
Brain Dump Fvckin-A Imps in Spandex Hung
The Intolerants** Hoof Hearted The Lactoids** Farmageddon
The Frotteurs Fringe Element** The Lunar Ticks The Prudes
Shroud of Touring Bad Juju Fashion Roadkill** The Lab Rats**
The Clown Pukes The Boffins** Dentistry Before Novocaine Yoda Lady Who
Shaken Not Stirred** Voodoo Clowns** Wally Von Zipper Ingsoc**
The Cautionaries** The Luddites Robo Sapiens The Dilettantes**
The Tchotchkes Gaijin** Robo Ex Machina The Religous Reich
Dimestore Hookers** Clockwork Asylum** Holier Than Thou The Minions**
Stinkfinger** Minnowhead** Opieland The Atta Boys
Diet Pax Angst Nut Sack Dance Smarmy Moe Foe**
Legba** Houri Sewer Soup Synergetics**
The Psycho Derelicts the Monkberries** Tastes Like Chicken** Car Bomb Dating**
Schizogeny Truth Decay** Bridey Murphy Anasazi**
Inevitable** Wally Palooka** Random Chaos** Bloody Mary
Poon Pud Commie Pinko Pedophobia
Pornocopia Erotique Life Among the Constipated Alien Proctology
Eroticamcorder The Fuh Kings Spambone Phuq
DinoSorceress Elvis As Messiah ProtoJudas Maxi Spaz
Hexus Sexus** Blonde Faith** The Psychodelic Spurs Icy Dicey
Near Vanna Two Hand Stroke Black Floyd Dick Nasty
The Mundanes** Panache InvisiGoth The Technophiles
Bulimic Buffet Kung Fu Grip** Rasputin's Gaze Butt Pimps
The Barbie Clones Artist Formerly Known as Needle Dick Honky Donkeys Panzer Roundup
Beeper Blitz Pony Up** the Diuretics** Ebola Cola**
Shotgun Enema Spinal Sap Robot Condoms Hare Pi
Pull My Finger Rooster Fries Courtney's Love Shack** Electric Lite Beer Band
Rosalita Stoned Kevorkian Logic** Spam Jam Gag Reflex**
Yugo Pinto** Second Hand Satire** Militia Ethnics Pamplemousse
Minnie Soda Rope Ladder to Hades** Quasi-Toto Fearful Symmetry**
Thought Police** Medulla Oblong Gadda Da Vida Sir Oscelot & Keen Otter Papal Bach Riders
Oozin' Oz** Hairball Isle of Lucy Jane's Brawn
Constant 137** The Spend Proctors Pipe Dream Uma's Army (or maybe Uma Zuma**)
The Futher Muckers Pit Bull Turbo The Mothers of Intervention Special Ed**
Monochrome Rainbow** Toll Free Tango** Hiccup Helen and the Canyon Yodel Club Polyester Wedding Dress
Password Pirates Hitler Can't Dance** Lip Kiss Cowboys Buckwheat's Barber**
Leisure Suit Zombies** Cat Scan His Boy Elroy** The Poindexter Pagans
Gauche Pity Coyote Spunk** Licking Pink Blind Man's Monocle**
The S Cargo Redneck Nuns Lesbian Beach Party Renegade Fairies**
The Crotch Crickets Premature Emasculation Tex Satan & The Triple 6 Shooters** Going Postal
Skank Divas Team Angel Punk Monkees** Dumpster Divers
Charlie Don't Surf** Gomer Goober Cherry Chihuahuas Bloated Samoans
Barbi Sol Barbizilla Beverly Bill Hillies Guardian Angles
Full Metal Jackie O** The Four Skins** Guitarantino** Hindu Head Band
Judas Love Mussolini Mambo Mob Jehovah's Walrus Tonya Hardly Knew Her
Drooling Band Joes Purgatory Road** Nurse Diesel Porn Hole
The OJ Jury Paula Jones' Head Afro Scream Behold the Lard
Breast Pillows Zazu Picasso Auslander** Beer Jelly

**These names have been taken by someone, please do not use!

Well, that's enough, some would say too much....hey, save your groans... just waiting for the oozin' oz.


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This page last modified on 02 December 2013

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